After Butch passed, I stopped saying this. After all, how could I possibly be lucky in love, if he wasn't here anymore?
The last five years have had huge ups and downs, with lots of experiences that tested my strength, courage and versatility. I was telling a couple all about some of the things that had happened, which I find easier to laugh about the further behind me they get...
One of them turned to me and said 'You have had such an unlucky life. Do you ever feel like giving up?'
When I returned home that night I pondered on what they had said. I don't really believe in luck. I have always believed that we make choices when we are presented with situations, events and people. The emotions and thoughts we are carrying at that time dictate whether it becomes a negative or a positive experience...and our subsequent reactions to that experience. If I was to look back on my life I couldn't say I was unlucky. I could, however, say I was dogged by unique experiences and given much room to grow within them....and as a result, I have awesome and amusing funny stories to tell, once I have distanced myself enough to see the funny side.
As I thought about that, I realised that it was time I started saying that I was lucky in love again, because although Butch is no longer here, it doesn't diminish what we had in any way. If it appears that way to others, then that is their view or issue and not mine. We were lucky, because we believed we were lucky to have met and loved. Just because he is no longer here doesn't make it any less true.
All too often when we lose someone we hide parts away, to avoid sharing the deeper parts of us, so that others cannot judge or get a glimpse within our grief shell.
Luck is what we make is. Life is what we make it. If we want to blame luck for where we are right now, we can....but we know different. Everything happens for a reason within its own unique and intricate design, even if we don't like it or agree with it.
There is no shame in having loved and lost. There is a time when we have to remember that we aren't lost and we were loved. Grief is the price we pay for the beauty of love...and really, would you want it any other way?!